she wears short skirts i wear mage robes
it’s come to my attention I don’t let any male get close to me. i just let them think they are.
if i ever become famous i’m going to create a fake account on twitter and tumblr and be part of my own fandom and i will be like bffs with my fans and we’ll fangirl over myself but they would have no idea it’s me
and then one day i would call them on skype and see the blood run out of their faces
i’m afraid of you
- 16 year old child: mom, dad: I'm gay/lesbian/bi/pan
- Straight parents: you're too young to know what your sexuality is! It's just a phase.
- Baby boy: *stares at a baby girl for no reason other than the fact that babies stare at everything*
- Straight parents: oooh! Ladies man! We're gonna have to keep the girls offa you!
When your pet adjusts their position so they can lay their head on you